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I was gratified when I weighed myself on Saturday to discover that I have lost a pound in the last week. It's not much, I know, but it is that small weight loss that will get me to my target safely and sustainably (I hope). There was a horrific story in the paper last week about a girl who lost something like 3 stone in 8 weeks and dropped dead. She had been following some crazy minimal calorie regime. I have read nothing good about that particular diet. Everyone I've seen comment about who has done it has immediately put back nearly or all of the amount they lost. As you would expect. I lost a lot of weight years ago with weight watchers, but that was over a two year period and it took several years more than that to put much of it back. Thankfully, I have never been as heavy again as I was when I started it.

This time I am doing Scottish Slimmers which works along similar principles, but mixing it in with a bit of low GL (which should help the bulge in the middle) and lots of exercise.
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I have mentioned previously that I really don't see myself walking up the aisle in a meringue. I've also told Himself this. But what will I wear? I know it's early days to be thinking about this, but with weight to lose and stuff, I can't help but do so. I have looked at various wedding designers' websites, and I have to say I have not been overly encouraged. All the dresses look the same! Quite apart from the fact that they are all displayed on stick thin models standing in unnatural positions wearing horrible pouty expressions. Very realistic!

This is the sort of thing that is popular now.


Not really me, especially with my flabby arms and big belly.

So I want something different, perhaps with a bit of colour even. And I've been doing some research. There are a whole range of dressmakers and designers who do wonderful designs, some of them quite local to where I live, others much further away. And most important of all, many of them are a fraction of the cost of the frocks in your mainstream bridal salon.

Today I thought I would look at this site.

Lindsay Fleming

Lindsay Fleming is an award winning Scottish designer. She produces mainly medieval inspired frocks such as this one.


It's perhaps still a little on the meringue side for my taste, but still a gorgeous dress. Sadly, it is also way outside the even tentative budget I have set for myself.

Fleming is also producing a collection based on the 1920s which is a bit less meringue like, but possibly only for the hyper skinny and flat chested. No prices on this one yet, but I suspect it too will be outside my budget.


Interestingly this particular shot was taken in Glasgow in one of Charles Rennie MacIntosh's buildings, the House for an Art Lover in Bellahouston Park, a wonderful building I visited a few years back.

Less of me

Sep. 4th, 2009 12:17 pm
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It is traditional, when thinking about a wedding for the bride to want to lose weight. I am no different. I have been trying to lose weight for most of this year in any case, but I find the thought of walking down the aisle feeling anything other than great about myself is concentrating my mind marvellously. Quite apart from the fact that the sort of outfit I am thinking about would look horrendous on a fatty, I want my beloved to be stunned when he sees me, but in a good way. :)

I've already lost a stone this year, and I'm taking a lot more exercise than I used to. I'm not so much a comfort eater, but I do like my food. I know I lose weight best with something that is flexible, and gives me sufficient food that I don't wake up in the night thinking about roast chicken or whatever. Filling up with soup is key for me, as is just not buying those things I know are bad for me. This isn't easy for everyone, I know. Keeping a food diary is also a must for me, as is measuring everything. I'm one of those cooks that usually just sloshes in ingredients along the 'that looks about right' principle. That's no use when you're trying to keep track of what you're eating. I know I start to slip off the rails when I stop measuring things.

As for exercise, it doesn't matter what it is so long as you enjoy doing it. I remember reading an article somewhere that said that people just had to accept that exercise is boring and do it like any other chore. I'm sorry but that doesn't work; you need to be motivated to exercise, the prospect of boredom doesn't motivate anybody. It also needs to be convenient. I used to go swimming once a week on the way home from work, as there was a swimming pool just along the road from where I worked. I changed my job and haven't been swimming since. Now I've discovered exercise dvds. I built up slowly, moving from an easy one once or twice a week to much harder ones more frequently. I love it.

So, I know what my big target is, but I also know that it will take a long time for me to get there. In the meantime I've set lots of little targets that should be much closer. Here goes!
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Before I got into this subject I was unaware of the plethora of websites devoted to weddings and everything concerning them, ranging from the huge sites that try and cover all angles, to smaller, more specialised sites. I thought it might be an idea to review a number of them, and how I have found using them.

Cheap Wedding Success

As a Scot this is a site after my own heart! It is a fabulous resource for the budget conscious. As well as giving lots of tips and hints for reducing costs, and keeping costs under control, it provides links to a range of resources where you can do things for yourself, for example stationary. A fancy stationary shop has opened up recently near where I live and I had a peek at their price list; I was horrified at how much even the most basic items cost. This is one area where I will certainly be doing things for myself.

You can sign up for an (intermittant) newsletter which provides themed tips, and if you do, you can download a budget planner. Many sites provide an online budget planner, whereas this is simply an adapted Excel spreadsheet that you can download. You can use it in Open Office as well if you don't have Excel, or any program that will open .xls files. I actually feel happier with something that you can download, rather than leaving all that personal financial information online, but I know that's not an issue for many people.

The site covers all areas of wedding planning, from how to get a good deal on your reception venue (if you're not using your back garden), to catering flowers and music. There is also a section where people can submit their own tips.

Well written and comprehensive, this is one I will come back to.
latestarter: (rings)
I have never seen the need for a woman to change her name on marriage. There is no law that says you have to, although some people assume there is. Indeed in Scotland, it's still a relatively new tradition. I've done a fair bit of family history research, and recall many baptismal records from the early nineteenth century which read something like John Smith, son of Robert Smith and his spouse Mary Stewart was baptised etc. You also see it on gravestones – Mary Stewart, beloved wife of Robert Smith. Civil Registration in the 1850s seems to have been the deciding factor in the change: government bureaucracies always like people being easy to keep track of.

My surname is very rare, and I rather like it, even though I continually have to spell it out to people and they inevitably get it wrong. It's part of who I am. I could hyphenate my name with his but I think that is silly unless both spouses do it and are comfortable doing it. There's also the issue of professional reputation, which is particularly relevant for someone my age.

I had all these arguments and others all lined up when I talked about the subject with Himself recently. He took the wind out my sails by not being bothered at all, which is nice, as a friend of mine said when she had tentatively broached the subject of not changing her name with her then fiancee, he had said she might as well hand the engagement ring back and they could cancel the wedding! I did think that was rather antediluvian. Such a relief to find that Himself, who is fairly conservative in many respects is actually pretty progressive in this regard.
latestarter: (rings)
They say that every little girl dreams of her wedding. I suppose I was the exception; I don't recall ever doing so. Floating down the aisle in a big white meringue to meet Prince Charming at the altar was never one of my fantasies. They involved time travel and star ships and interesting stuff like that. When I was older, as I said yesterday, I was determined to be right on and cool and feminist. Getting married didn't quite figure in that equation; it was old hat and so patriarchal it wasn't worth thinking about. Of late years however, I must confess to giving some thought to the sort of thing I would wear, should such an unexpected thing happen (needless to say it didn't involve meringues). However, when my beloved proposed to me a couple of months ago, no one was more surprised than me to find myself surfing wedding websites, and researching the ins and outs of getting married with an almost fanatical devotion.

Indeed, Himself told me (rather sternly I thought) that there is more to marriage than a wedding. Of course there is, but his proposal seems to have unleashed an inner girlyness in me that I never knew was there. It's actually quite fun. I love planning things at the best of times, but planning a wedding is a planner's dream. Or nightmare depending on your point of view :).
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So. I always believe that first posts should be some sort of introduction, even if there's no-one reading, and I very much doubt that there is at the moment. I want to make this a public journal, but at the same time I don't want to provide too much personal information. A contradiction, I hear you cry; surely if I'm going to say anything worthwhile I will have to give away a degree of personal information. Of course, but I'm going to try and limit it to the subject at hand.

The subject at hand is, of course, the rationale for this journal. I am in my fifties and I have recently begun a journey I had (almost) given up all expectation of ever undertaking. Two months ago, my beloved asked me to marry him, and it has had the most extraordinary effect on me. Compared to my usual, practical self, I've turned into a veritable bridezilla: it's quite bizarre.

When I was young, I never had any desire to get married - it was far too conventional a thing, and I was determined not to be conventional. On reflection, it's perhaps just as well that I felt like that, as it made extricating myself from the rather horrible live-in relationship that I had at the time rather easier than it might have been had I married him. After that I dated on and off, but nothing serious until I met my beloved three years ago. And I find that as I have grown older, my attitudes have changed, grown more conservative if you like. I find that I would rather like to be married. Worse still, I find I would rather like to go through the whole girly frill fest. Go figure. So I thought I would chart my experiences, even though it's likely to be some considerable time before we do actually tie the knot, as I think there are some peculiar challenges and considerations to being an older, first time bride.


latestarter: (Default)
At long last, love

April 2012

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